Pregnant with emotion.

The emotional phase of my pregnancy has started, everyone proceed with caution.
Saying that I am emotional is an understatement. I am not mad or even having any scary mood swings I have just turned into a full on feeler. I care about everything and everyone.
I am pretty sure the emotional reservoir was broken a week ago when our cat Opus was hit by a car (he is ok, don’t panic, we just didn’t know it at first). I have had Opus for 14 years. One morning I went upstairs to find him heaved over with his eyes closed and crying, I checked him head to toe and couldn’t see anything and thought that this was just the end. I called Kevin bawling, heaving, howling, sniffling that our first fur baby was dying and I couldn’t bare to say goodbye alone. Of course like all animal emergencies this happens on the weekend when only emergency vets are open, I couldn’t even move him without him screaming in pain. Luckily I found a vet willing to talk me threw a physical over the phone since he was so old and not in the best shape (he weighs about 30 lbs). It didn’t take long to find the culprit. I moved my hands down his side and underneath and felt his ribs…where they shouldn’t be, loosely under his skin. He hissed confirming the vets suspicion of broken ribs. They said they wouldn’t put him under for an xray at his age or weight and there is nothing they really can do for broken ribs and that his vet visit could wait till Monday as long as he was eating and drinking, which he was about 5 cans of food a day (don‘t judge, if you were hit by a car you would emotional eat too!). They told me everything to do to help him and a little over a week later he is able to walk around and has even tried to jump.
So yes, my cat being hit by a car, that is an extremely valid reason to be an emotional wreck, but everyday since then it has gotten worse.
This week Kevin ran out to pick up dinner from the grocery, he returned to a sobbing weeping wife. He immediately dropped the groceries and ran to my side only to find that a story on the news made me cry. Now granted it was a horribly sad story with a wonderful happy ending…apparently a little emotional wave my hormones couldn’t take about St. Judes (a foundation I am crazy passionate for, please click here to go to their website or make a dontation). I already would get choked up post pregnancy over anything related to St. Jude’s let alone now with our little one bopping around in my belly.
But a jewelry commercial…then crying over the television show “The Sing Off” because it reminded me of show choir in middle school…then crying because I felt bad for the kids that got kicked off that show that go to the high school down the street…then crying because Kevin cleaned the house…etc. Everyday it is something new. This week has been brutal already and being pregnant not only with a baby but with emotion hasn’t made it any easier to survive.
Work has been horrendous, I am overwhelmed to say the least. With calibrations, corporate visits, breaking sales records and loosing a manager taking our management team down to a two man team during the busiest week of the year…I want to cry now just remembering it all. I am not going to lie, there have been a few days where as soon as I have hit the car the waterworks started, I would have cried on my way to the car but with the wonderful frosty weather we are having I really didn’t want my face to freeze. So this week I have turned the heat up in the car to full blast as soon as I get in to the point where I am pretty sure I could smell the plastic from the vents melting and when warm enough started my sob fest.
Surprisingly Kevin hasn’t called me crazy or even looked at me like the dogs do when I start to cry (click here to see example) he just hugs me and smiles. I am pretty sure that he thinks if he gives off the inkling that I may be over reacting to a jewelry commercial I might cry even harder because he thinks I am crazy so he just summons a straight face and loves me any ways.
I am goober, that is really all there is to it. I laugh when I think about it all and at the same time I could get choked up now if I start imagining the moment we hear if our little bean is a mr. or a miss. I guess I just picked the most dangerous season of all to be an emotional mess where “Christmas Shoes” could pop on the radio at any given moment or a Hallmark commercial could send me through a box of Kleenex. So even though the movie get’s me every time (I will probably cry if I think about it too much) I will go with a sentiment from my cousin Jimmy Stewart (cool huh?) “It is a wonderful life,” I just have a lot of love for the loves in my life and maybe my baby brain is just especially aware of how wonderful life really is.


3 thoughts on “Pregnant with emotion.

  1. It is a wonderful life! and you make it even more so…
    We should sit and watch Hallmark commercials together ..
    I will bring the Kleenex =)

  2. Awww… i am glad that Opus is okay…and I remember crying at everything and anything – and really really really crying for sad things. Those pregnant hormones can make you feel wonderful AND exhausted – you can feel like you are on a roller coaster. Hang on! It is quite a ride! Wheeeee! Take some time for yourself this weekend, and take some time to laugh, too. Hope you know how much you are loved!

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