Look but don’t touch.

Have you ever had a complete stranger walk up and hug you? Hug you and squeeze you? Hang on for that extra squeeze that makes it go from awkward to just plain uncomfortable? That is my life with the bump, just trade out the hugging for belly molesting.
Everyday, everywhere someone wants to touch the bump. I am already not a touchy feely person so this extra attention from strangers isn’t welcome. It doesn’t bother me at all if I know the person but random lady at the grocery store doing a full on belly grab like she was my lady doctor examining me was a little (a lot) much.
It is a very odd situation to be put in. One minute your shopping for bread the next your being smothered by Miss. Touchy Feely. What do you do? I am no pro at handling socially awkward situations…in fact I usually just make it worse. Usually I bite my tongue and smile (trying to wipethe surprised/offended look off my face) while they get their belly fix and walk away feeling violated and smothered thinking I should invest in a “you may look but you may not touch” t-shirt to remind people to keep their manners in check. Maybe when people touch my belly I should in turn touch theirs? God forbid, that would probably make them feel uncomfortable…because they are a complete stranger why would I touch their body?
I adore being pregnant and love sharing that experience but my belly isn’t community property and I would at least appreciate people asking before they laid their hands on me.
Stranger’s who belly touch are often the ones who also throw down the gauntlet of pregnancy advice I spoke earlier about here. If your going to put your hands on my belly, please do not chime in with “my goodness, you are carrying so small/big”. No pregnant person wants to hear this, ever. I can not stress this enough. I can control the way my belly looks just about as well these strangers can control their impulse to touch my belly (didn’t we all go to kindergarten and learn ‘look but don’t touch’?).
The only thing I ask of you strangers is for some common sense and manners. Strangers please also consider the fact that pregnancy ramps up the “mama bear instinct” and you reaching out your hand and placing the other around my back as if the hold me in place while you fondle my belly puts me into survival mode and my only objective is to get me and my defenseless baby away from you the stranger who just decided to get all up in our business.
I am just amazed by the number of random people who find pregnancy to be some sort of common bond that breaks down all normal social boundaries. One thing is for sure, I am one person you can count on that won’t ever be belly bothering anyone.


2 thoughts on “Look but don’t touch.

  1. First congratulations and second I loved your post. It amazes me that people have no common sense. I most definitely never get touchy feely when I see a pregnant stranger. Even with my own family members I always ask first if I can touch their belly. My husband and I are trying to get pregnant so this was very interesting to read. Thank you.

  2. I can make you a shirt… I remember the day I brought you home from the hospital…you were just over 4lbs and someone I had only met once before came up to me and attempted to take you from my arms, I resisted and she looked surprised.. and said” I want to hold her”…after all the months of everyone touching my belly and feeling the same way you do ..”belly bothered”…. I even surprised myself when I simply said “No!” .. then tried to make it polite as I stumbled with reasons.. “we just got home”, “you were a preemie.”…..” I was about to nurse you” … didn’t work.. she got upset… and if I had it to do over I would do it all again… so be prepared for everyone wanting to touch Noah, his little fingers and toes… or smell his little head….and the surprise “No!” =)

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