The breast feeding chronicles.

Thrush. One small word, so much pain.

If there was one thing I was sure on the entire pregnancy was the fact that I was going to breastfeed. No if’s and’s or but’s this kid
was going to be raised on the boob. I donated every formula sample that arrived at my house before Noah arrived and mentally prepared myself for the job my girls were about to take on.

Right after Noah was born while we were in recovery, they handed him to me and within seconds asked me “do you want to breastfeed him  now?” Panic ensued in my head. I thought, oh my God it hasn’t even been 5  minutes and I am going to fail my child – how am I going to do this? There were about 6 people in the room and I can’t even pee in when there is someone in the stall next to me and I have been peeing my whole life how was I supposed to figure out this whole nursing thing with a crowd? I got over my modesty thing pretty quick, after all the last 18 hours of my life were anything but modest so what the heck. But I still had a good case of breastfeeding anxiety.

To my delight there was no need for panic, he knew just what to do (again GENIUS baby!). They placed him on me, he latched, I took a sigh of relief. Feeding one down just 78 million more to go – I thought I can do this!

Breastfeeding was a breeze. I thought to myself how do women complain about this? What is the big deal, this is fantastic. I was on a motherhood high. I was enamored that my body was producing food for a human I created. As far as I was concerned I was the bomb.

Then it happened.

In the middle of a feeding one morning I felt it. I was  pretty sure that half way through feeding Noah figured out a way to electrocute  me while feeding. Not cool. None the less I pressed through. I figured oh…that is the discomfort mom’s talk about. WRONG.

The electrifying feedings continued throughout the day then the night time feedings came.  The electrocuting continued along with the new stabbing, ripping, someone giving your boob an indian burn feeling. Ouch.

Every feeding was like a form of torture, after a couple of days of this I was ready to sign up for water boarding. Even though it felt like the little guy was literally sucking the life from me I kept going. No pain, no baby weight gain and that was not going to happen.

Then I remembered thrush. I remembered being little when my mom was nursing my brother and her kicking the coffee table while nursing and trying not to cry, she mentioned it while I was pregnant and said it was because of something called thrush.

No sooner had I remembered, did I have thrush typed into my google search engine.

Sure enough thrush was the culprit. The antibiotics they had put me on before and after his delivery caused me to get thrush. Noah had it too.  Thrush happens when bacteria gets thrown off in your body – it can cause yeast to grow on the babies tongue and sides of mouth which will eventually cause irritation and it causes mom to get jump out of your skin kind of pain. Luckily it didn’t bother him as much as it
bothered me, he got fruit punch flavored medicine and I got stabbing death pain
via my boobs.

After Noah and I were on our meds for a couple of days things started getting easier, less electrifying.

Thankfully the thrush monster is long gone now and Noah and I are now back to our breastfeeding smooth sailing (which I will never take for granted again!).


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